Thursday, September 21, 2006


Glora painted our guest room purple.

I don't mean the shade of purple historically associated with royalty. It's girl purple. I'm not sure which shade of girl purple--I'm not qualified to make those distinctions.

We began with one purple wall.

"What do you think?" Gloria asked as I walked into the room, newly painted for the first time.

"Agggghhh! My eyes!"

"You don't like it," she said.

"Whatever gave you that idea?" I asked.

Eli 5.1 walked into the room. "Aggghhh!" he said. "It's PURPLE!"

"You paid him to do that," Gloria said.

"I did not," I said. "All men are wired that way. Our only use for purple is to color the velevety robes that are placed over our shoulders when we're crowned king."

Gloria decided that because one purple wall didn't quite look right, her best option was to paint the other three walls purple. "It's the Paintocalypse," I said.

"That didn't work out like I expected it too," she said. "This color is about two shades darker than the swatch."

The ceiling--or, as I refer to it now, "the escape hatch"--is still white, though.

Gloria's bummed out because she painted a room purple and it looks, well, so damned purple. So she was sitting around yesterday, bummed out, and Eli 5.1 walked up and put his arms around her. "Mommy, I LIKE the guest room," he said.

"You do?" she asked, brightening.

"Well, I really don't," he said, "but I'm trying to make you feel better."

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