Wednesday, September 04, 2019

A Toast to Toast

"Okay, I'm going to have a piece of toast for lunch," I said. "I really like this new multi-grain bread."

I put a slice in the toaster. Seriously, this bread is terrific.

"Ooh, you can't do that,"Gloria said, holding up the bag. "There's mold."

"Well, no toast for lunch, then," I said.

"Wait," she said. "I can slice this loaf of French bread and you can use that."

"That seems like a lot of work," I said. "I can just put it in the microwave."

"Don't do that." She sliced. "Here, try this piece," she said.

"That won't fit," I said. "It's too wide."

"You're very negative about this," she said.

"Toast is very geometric to me," I said. "You have a product specifically made to fit precisely inside a toasting device. There is no reason not to use that product."

"You just put it in the toaster diagonally," she said. "Then, halfway through, you reverse it."

"I feel like I went to the beach with a lawn chair and it turned into D-Day," I said.

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