Goats
I brought home doughnuts."I present to you, a holiday miracle," I said to Eli 17.4. He loves doughnuts with icing--no filling, just icing, which Krispy Kreme hasn't had in over a year.
I opened the box. Inside were "plaid" doughnuts--plain doughnuts with icing.
"Let's go!" he said. "I can't believe you found them!" A hero's welcome. Felt good.
"I got you a cinnamon with cream cheese frosting," I told Gloria.
"Oh," she said.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Nothing," she said.
"You gave me the face," I said.
"They didn't have pumpkin or sour cream?" she asked.
"Did you just doughnut shame me?" I asked.
"How do you like my haircut?" Eli asked, laughing. The haircut is a legendary family story. Eli went for a haircut last year, got it cut differently, and came home. He asked his mom if she liked it, and she said "Uh, sure," and gave him the face.
I went back to my study (Slay the Spire, last boss, damn it), and Gloria came in a few minutes later. "You know, I try to be positive and upbeat all the time, and then I slip about a haircut--"
"But fuck ONE goat," I said.
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