Monday, September 25, 2006

DQRB Rated "M" for Mature

Gloria was reading the newspaper.

"Here's a phrase I never thought I'd hear," she said. "Laser vaginal rejuvenation."

"I think my brain just exploded," I said. "I need a trash bag and a bucket."

"Here, look at this ad," she said.

Considering Cosmetic Gynecology?
Our one-hour procedure can tighten the vagina after childbirth and enhance sexual gratification. We can also correct stress, urinary intoninence, reduce large/uneven labia minora and reconstruct the hymen.

"That's amazing," I said. "So it's like Ponce De Leon and his search for the Fountain of Youth, but with vaginas."

"Maybe I should have something done," Gloria said. "Maybe I'm uneven."

"I wouldn't worry about it," I said. "I don't use a level."

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