From Bad To Worse: Fried Chicken EditionWell, it's hard to tell.
One of the things I've always enjoyed about writing the blog is that I never know what will spark your imagination. Last week, I thought The Dream Game would generate plenty of interest and many fascinating dreams.
It did not.
Yesterday, I wrote a bit of a throwaway (I thought)about fried chicken and a urinal.
Your collective interest headed on a rocket to the moon.
Stephen Kreuch made my favorite reference: This is like Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of the Urinal Chicken.
If you turn to the back of the book, the solution may be:
The man was peeing while holding the fried chicken in his mouth with his teeth. He peed long enough that his teeth tore through the bite of grizzled chicken and it fell into the urinal while he tried to catch it, to no avail.
I don't know about you, but when I was a kid, I thought Encyclopedia Brown totally kicked ass.
Kadunta noted (quite correctly) that the original text of the post said "a man could be holding a piece of mouth in his chicken while he urinates." I don't even want to think about what that might possibly mean (and I fixed the post).
The dominant theory via e-mail presents scenario #4: the chicken was deposited in the urinal in protest of its quality.
Yes, exhausted sweaty man standing in front of a tank in Tiananmen Square, holding a piece of fried chicken. Winning the 200 meters in the 1968 Olympic Games and holding up the fried chicken in protest.
Actually, let's stop for a minute right there. Please don't let that last sentence lead you to believe that I have anything but respect for Tommie Smith and John Carlos, who were stone-cold badasses. If I'm ever that strong for even one moment in my life, I will be glad. I just thought exhausted sweaty man in a blue work shirt holding up a piece of fried chicken on the Olympic podium was a quality moment.
Exhausted sweaty man in bed with Yoko Ono, holding up a piece of chicken. The sign on the window behind him reads "FOUL FOWL."
Let's close with sweaty man destroying the fried chicken inventory and throwing it into Boston Harbor.
You can stop groaning now--I'm done.