Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Of Bats And Gloves

After 7:15 a.m. hockey practice on Saturday morning, we went to a sporting goods store to buy a new baseball bat.

We have a wood baseball bat, but it's for an adult, and Eli 11.2 wanted something that was more his size. He found a bat that was the perfect weight for him, and we bought it.

(parenthetical distraction)
Why am I buying a bat when he doesn't play baseball? Well, he does play it, just not on a team. He plays everything. The list: hockey, soccer, tennis, golf, flag football, baseball, basketball, track, unicycling, the death of me.

Wait, that last entry is not a sport.

He hits the ball a mile, at least when I'm throwing BP, and it's a fun thing to do in the cul-de-sac with a tennis ball (he's hitting other roofs on the fly).
(end parenthetical distraction)

In the parking lot, he's looking at the bat and a pair of batting gloves that he scammed me into getting as well. I'm working on unpackaging the gloves as he looks at his bat. "I am so glad to get a new bat," he said. "Do you know who signed the other bat? Derek Jeter. YANKEE."

That's my boy. I try very hard not to pass any prejudices I have along to Eli, but I have purposely made an exception for the Yankees.

"Did you see that Orioles home run last night that the umpires blew? Has any call ever gone AGAINST the Yankees? EVER?"

"No, and one never will," I said.

"I can't wait to have a bat signed by a different player," he said, looking up just as I threw one of the batting gloves at him. It hit him in the face. "HEY! A little warning would be nice!" he said.

He looked back down at the bat. I threw the second glove and it hit him in the face. "Incoming," I said.

"Well played," he said. "Very well played." He looked at the bat for a few seconds. "Dad, can you tell me who signed this bat? I'm having a hard time reading...OH NO."


"DEREK JETER!" he said, laughing.

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