Tuesday, August 23, 2016


"It's almost hypnotic, really," I said.

"They could make this a live feed on the Internet and I'd watch it all day," Eli 15.0 said.

"Do you think that's Buster?" I asked.

"No, he  looks like Walter," Eli said. "I think Buster is over there by the door."


"Looks like Terry is headed for the sin bin," Eli said.

"Lance, too," I said. "Coincidental minors."

We're in PetSmart, of course, standing outside the glassed-in area that is doggy day camp. It's basically a dozen dogs inside a room, and all of them are constantly moving around. Relationships are formed and broken in seconds. New rivalries emerge.

"It's the history of the Roman Empire in under five minutes, but with dogs," I said.

Plus, there's the person.

One person. One women in her late teens to rule them all.

"What do you think is the worst job on Earth?" I asked.

"Hmm, I don't know," Eli said. "Cleaning up biohazards or something?"

"The people with this job apply for that job," I said, as the attendant tried to handle approximately ten disagreements among campers simultaneously.

Besides interpersonal conflicts, there's a little board that lists the dogs names, and you can spend all kinds of time trying to figure out if the bulldog is Wally, Dante, or Thomas.

"All they need is a snack bar," Eli said. "This is better than the movies."

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