The Lesson of These Olympics: Never Lie To Your Mother
Some of our Olympic idiots apparently lied to Brazilian police about getting robbed at gunpoint.Ryan Lochte, head idiot, told this story to his mother, who then somehow notified the press, and it all went from there.
Of course, Ryan Lochte wouldn't be in all kinds of trouble now if he'd followed the Prime Directive for children: never lie to your mother.
Even at my age, I never lie to my mother. Mothers are generally equipped with the Advanced Lie Detector Mark IV, and they will know you're telling a lie before you even finish telling the lie.
Mom always knew, and after a period of rebellion (from age 5 to about 30, so it was quite a long rebellion), I realized it was so much easier to tell the truth--to her and everyone else, too.
Once I just started being honest, life got much less complicated, and quickly. When you're telling the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
It's pleasant, really.
Lochte's mother apparently doesn't have the advanced lie detector that my mom has, but she still took a lie and bad things happened.
Yes, occasionally you piss someone off by telling the truth. That can't be helped. It's still much, much easier.
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