Wednesday, May 05, 2010


"So you remember that I was going to ask Tom and Brenda if they could go to dinner with us?"

"Um, what?" That's my go-to phrase when I have no idea what Gloria is talking about.

"Dinner," she said. "We talked about it last week."

"Oh, right," I said.That's my follow-up go-to phrase.

"We're going out on Saturday," she said.

"Just the four of us, right?" I asked. To me, more than four people equals a mob.

"Yes," she said. "You know, I used to think that it would be fun to invite people who didn't know each other but were friends of mine, because I thought they would all like each other. It never seemed to work out that way, though."

"Of course it didn't work out that way," I said. "That's a code violation."


"Men don't want surprises," I said. "We actively prevent them."

She laughed.

"If men are involved, the only acceptable surprise guests are children from the Make-A-Wish foundation," I said.

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