Thursday, December 10, 2015


I am famously an entirely awful loader of the dishwasher.

That is, according to Dishwasher Einstein, otherwise known as DQ Reader My Wife, who could load an entire military jeep inside a dishwasher and have room left over.

We have a family tradition at Thanksgiving. Gloria does all the work, and then, after we eat, I load the dishwasher very poorly with some of the hundreds of cooking bowls, plates, cups, and silverware.

I do what seems like a fair job, and then she goes back in and loads twice as much stuff.

I did that this Thanksgiving, which was on Wednesday due to a hockey tournament which I still haven't written about.

"Okay, I think it's loaded," I said, stepping away to admire my handiwork.

"Oh my God," Gloria said, immediately stepping in, her hands moving at the speed of a billionth degree black belt. "You are incompetent," she said, laughing.

"I prefer to think of it as 'artisanal' incompetence," I said.

Eli 14.4 burst out laughing. I may get a t-shirt.

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