Monday, December 18, 2017

Crisis in the Christmas

"I can't find the Christmas elf," Gloria said.

"What?" I asked, clearly alarmed.

"Maybe I threw it away when I cleaned house last summer," she said.

"Throw away Evan the Inappropriate Elf? Impossible!" I said. "He's a treasured part of the Family Christmas Experience!"

"I thought the headless reindeer was the treasured part," she said.

"He is! But Evan is irreplaceable," I said. "How many elves have ever put a gift box over their crotch?"

"I must have it somewhere," she said. "Maybe I didn't throw it away."

"I certainly hope not," I said. "Keep looking!"

This is the last known picture of Evan:

If you see him, please contact me immediately.

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