Thursday, June 07, 2018

Motivational Crisis


"I need to discuss something serious with you," I said to Gloria. 

"What?" She asked, alarmed. 

"I found an inspirational towel in the bathroom."

She laughed. "It was on sale!"

"I'm not opposed to inspirational towels," I said, "depending on the message. For instance, 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' is acceptable, as is 'If you find yourself in hell, keep going.' "

"I don't think they make those," she said, laughing. 

"Other good choices include 'What fresh hell is this?' and 'War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.' If you can find any of those, please get them immediately."

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