Swarms
I mowed the lawn today."We have a situation out there," I said, coming in after about fifteen minutes.
"What's that?" Gloria asked.
"Mosquitoes. Waves of mosquitoes. I could cut out a solid brick of them with the proper tools."
"We have repellent in the bathroom." She went down the hall and brought back a bottle.
I scanned the label.
"I don't see DEET or Picaridin," I said. "There's a picture of a baby turtle in sunglasses."
"It's eco-friendly," she said.
"The active ingredient appears to be unicorn dust mixed with mint," I said. "I'll be back."
I returned from the store with a can of DEET-based repellent and proceeded to douse my clothes, then doused them again. I finished the lawn.
"How was it out there?" Gloria asked as I walked in.
"The front lines held," I said. "Mutually assured destruction and all that."
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