Thursday, October 04, 2018

Jurassic Narc

We were all sitting in the living room.

"Scientists are going to bring back the dinosaurs," Gloria said. "I think that's terribly unethical."

"It's kind of the dark frontier of ethics," I said. "Uncharted territory. Besides, the mammoths would be first."

"But what if they bring them back and a predator escapes?"

"Duh, just put them all on an island behind electric fences," I said.

Eli 17.2 laughed. "Sure," he said. "We know that will work."

"Well, what if one gets loose and eats a tourist?"

"If I'm paying a fortune to go to a dinosaur theme park, I'm going to be very disappointed if a tourist doesn't get eaten. Besides, we have nukes. If we have to, we can drop nuclear weapons to destroy the island. Where's The Rock?"

Eli burst out laughing. "Oh my God, he is the perfect person for that."

"Oh, no, I forgot something," I said. "This is all ruined."

"Why?" Eli asked.

"Because some guy will take a breeding pair back to Florida--"

"Florida Guy," Gloria said. Eli laughed.

"Florida Guy will take a breeding pair back and release them into the Everglades," I said. "To control the python population. Probably while naked."

"I'd go to the Everglades to see that," Eli said.

"Don't need to," I said. "Just wait for the live cam."

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