Monday, March 15, 2021

One Of These Two Things Happened Today

1. I was attacked by a medical scale in a doctor's office. 
2. I was vaccinated for COVID-19.

Please consider your answer carefully, then continue. 

It was a trick question. Both of these things happened to me today. 

Let's discuss them in order. 

First, allow me to present my assailant:












In repose, the medical scale is a harmless, pleasant creature. However, when unfolded to its full height, those who step off its surface before it is fully satisfied will be attacked so viciously that their glasses will fly off. 

The weapon, as it was, is the beak of the beast, which rested upon my head until suddenly sliding down and slapping me in the face. 

Much, much laughter ensued. 

Second, a COVID-19 vaccine. 

I was scheduled (50+, no comorbidities) to become eligible for a vaccine on May 22, which was great news, as I had estimated mid-summer, at the earliest, only a few weeks ago. 

Months ago, Meijer (the regional grocery store here that is much beloved by all) sent out an email to their customers asking them to sign up for a vaccine notification and scheduling list, because they were planning to give vaccinations. 

I signed up immediately upon receiving the email, because I smelled a queue, and I wanted to be as close to the front as possible.

I also called DQ Reader Gloria and told her to sign up as well. She did, and only a short while after I did. 

On Friday, I was at the house visiting both her and Gracie, and my phone made the text chime. I saw a message from Meijer telling me I had a 15-minute window to sign up for a vaccination appointment. 

Great, I thought. They're already scheduling for the week of the 22nd. 

I start working through the scheduling process, and they're not scheduling for the 22nd. They're scheduling for the 15th (today). 

It was impossible to describe the sense of elation I felt when my appointment was confirmed. It was like a giant weight had been lifted from my shoulders. 

I expected something to go wrong, to be told that the appointment was in error, but no text came, and I showed up today and went through the process in twenty minutes and had the enormous pleasure of having someone stick a needle in my arm. I had the biggest smile on my face. 

Gloria was vaccinated ten minutes later. She'd received the text on Friday only a few minutes after I did.

Pfizer, in case you're wondering. And my second dose is April 5, which is the day after my birthday (the dreaded Easter birthday, immortalized in 2010 in the post "Jesus Ruined My Birthday").

This year, it will be much better.

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