The World Must Increase Its Production of Blueberry Bagels
I went on a ninety-minute walk today, and after an hour I was getting hungry. I walked past a bagel shop and decided to get a blueberry bagel and toast it when I got home.
As soon as I decided I was going to stop, I could taste that toasted bagel. The perfect addition to a protein shake and yogurt (which is my usual lunch now).
I walked up the counter, full of victory, and the guy told me they're out of blueberry bagels.
The world is out of blueberry bagels.
It's been like this for decades. Einstein's Bagels in Austin were always out of blueberry bagels first. There are three different bagel shops in Grand Rapids I go to occasionally, and they're always out of blueberry bagels. Maybe they're getting scalped on eBay. Maybe it's the fault of Big Bagel. Maybe it's (gasp) the Deep State. I don't know.
What I do know is that all this foolishness needs to stop and world production of blueberry bagels needs to increase immediately.
In other "news," I'm supposed to put a warm compress on my eyelid three times a day, and I was wisely advised to put rice in a sock and microwave it, which has the added benefit of making my study smell delicious in the morning. Win/win.
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