Wednesday, May 02, 2018

Commerce (Acoustic Edition)

"Have you ever thought about opening a local business?" Gloria asked. We were at a restaurant.

"Yes, I'm going to open a restaurant where I tell people I don't like to leave," I said. "I'm going to call it 'No Remorse'."

"I think what this town needs is a music venue," she said. "Acoustic, with coffee and maybe baked goods. And outdoor seating."

"So you think the hole in the local commercial portfolio is the exact place where you would most like to hang out," I said.

She laughed. "That's right."

We sat for a while.

"This place isn't going to make it," I said. "5:30 and it's almost empty. And the few people who are here look like they're at least sixty."

"Remember when it opened and it was packed? Every person in here was a blonde in her thirties," she asked.

Three very old people walked in.

"Oldies!" I whispered. "The oldies have taken over. Now no one younger than fifty would be caught dead in here."

"Oh no," she said, "that means we're so old we still belong."

"Welcome to your fifties," I said. "A grim, dystopian future."

"Uh-oh," she said. "I just thought of something. How do I keep them out of my new music house?"

"They're like sugar ants," I said. "One shows up, then one more, then they're everywhere, and you can't get rid of them."




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