The Worst Birthday
I'm not going to identify the reader, for obvious reasons, but this is definitely the best worst birthday story I received:Mine was last week and actually probably the worst I've ever had due to no cards, no gifts and not treats. I say no treats because my girlfriend told me not to bake myself a nice cake, she wanted to make me a cake... of some sort.
To put this in context, my girlfriend is not an accomplished cook and certainly not for sweet things. So i advised her to go to a reputable cooking website in order to get a guaranteed recipe. She ignored my advice but did eventually take my request for blueberry muffins.
The blueberry muffins she made were like leather and tasted of cardboard.
I spent the week, slowly working through them like a chore (one a day) with her complaining all the time that they were terrible and that she felt really bad for making them so terribly, at the same time i was reassuring her they weren't too bad and I liked them. Well, I was telling the truth, kind of - cardboard is at least bland, so I didn't /dislike/ them!
The slow but steady disposal of the crime is what makes this story so great for me.
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