Monday, October 11, 2004

The Loaner

I took my car in for service today.

I had asked for a loaner when I made the appointment, but when I showed up, everything they had was already spoken for. All they had left was a sports utility vehicle, a very nice one, and in a shocking display of customer service, they let me use it.

I've never driven a SUV before. I felt like a giraffe. I was lowering the window at stop lights and eating leaves from the tops of trees. I threw a penny out the window and it took three seconds to reach the street. I actually saw a performance artist climbing the passenger side, which was fine, but then the cops arrived and every time I took a turn three people fell off.

I hope I get my car back today. I just looked outside and there's a team of mountaineers and sherpas assembling in my front yard.

They'll want boiling water for their dehydrated rations soon.

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