Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Drawing the Line

The company where I work, like many companies, sends out holiday cards to its customers. If an employee has customer accounts, they get a little catalog showing the different cards available, and they choose a design.

I normally don't see this catalog, because I don't have any customer contact (customer should be celebrating this), but friend of mine called me in and showed me one design in particular.

It was a snowman with boobies.

Red snow boobies, placed on the white snowman in the appropiate boobage areas.

Before you ask, these were definitely not man-boobies. The snowman also wore a grass skirt.

Compared to the other placid holiday scenes, this seemed sort of odd, so I walked down to our operations manager. She pretends to be incredibly mean and threatening, but she actually has this wicked, dark sense of humor, and isn't particularly mean at all.

"Let me show you something," I said, walking into her office. I showed her the catalog, pointing. "Do you feel snow boobies are appropriate?"

"I do," she said, her stern expression entirely unchanged.

"What about snow boobies with nipples?"

"That crosses the line," she said.

"So you draw the line at nipples?" I asked.

"That's the line," she said. Now she's trying not to laugh.

I walked back down the hall, then had a thought. I marched back to her office.

"What if it was a male snowman wearing a banana hammock?" I asked. "Also over the line?"

"OVER THE LINE," she said.

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