Cleaning and Music
I almost never do this (actually, I've never done this before today), but I wrote for an hour this morning and stopped.
Too much in my head.
Instead, I cleaned, which is the great avoidance mechanism if I can't get something else done.
Until recently, I had no idea that cleaning had a calming effect. I was doing it wrong--rushing to get done as quickly as possible--so I never understood that when you clean in a methodical fashion, there is a kind of satisfaction that is very soothing.
Once I realized that you have to clean in one swoop, not piecemeal, and that doing it half-ass is more stressful than not doing it at all, I got into the zen of it all.
Part of this process is wearing headphones and listening to music to drown out the vacuum cleaner.
Recently, I've been listening to the recent re-release of Sign O' the Times. What I find really striking about that album is that Prince put the best song as the first cut of a double album.
Boy, that takes confidence.
In particular, there is a lyric that is one of the most compelling I've ever heard, mostly because of the way he phrases it:
In September my cousin tried reefer for the very first time
Now he's doing horse
It's June
You can listen to it here (that section is around 1:20), if you're interested. It's unbelievably haunting, and it sticks with you for a long time.
I've always been fascinated by albums where the first track perfectly sets the tone for the rest of the album. Lots of artists don't do that, but there are certain albums where the first track just leaves you breathless.
So, I sat down and made a small list of songs that do just that.
Sign O' the Times (Prince)
Sympathy for the Devil (Rolling Stones)
Seven Nation Army (White Stripes)
Baba O'Riley (the Who)
Purple Haze (Jimi Hendrix)
Straight Outta Compton (NWA)
Down to the Waterline (Dire Straits)
Roundabout (Yes)
If you're old like me, these songs will all be familiar, with the possible exception of Down to the Waterline, which was the opening track on Dire Strait's first album. Dire Straits had a very unique sound, and I still remember hearing that song for the first time and feeling my head explode. It was so tightly constructed, so lean, and it encapsulated the band's sound perfectly.
More Than a Feeling did the same thing for Boston, I think.
Wait, I only wrote for an hour today? That's just so far. I'm going back to it shortly. Books don't write themselves, much to my dismay.
Not A Good Sign
I have two specific types of pen that I use when I write.
The first is when I'm writing drafts. It has a slightly broader tip. I don't know why I like it for writing drafts. I just do.
The pen I use when editing has a more narrow tip.
These pens are made by different companies. I don't use other pens.
I ordered a box of the editing pens (believe it or not, I go through them pretty quickly now) and received it today. I took off the shipping envelope, help up the box of pens, and said, "Now that is sexy."
With COVID, the election, and rice in the microwave, I am clearly losing my mind.
Pro Tip
What is the correct response?
SCENARIO
A bag of instant rice is supposed to be in the microwave for 90 seconds. You walk over with 10 seconds left and see that the bag is inflated to a concerning degree.
Do you:
1) Stand looking into the microwave like a dumbass and say "Gee, I wonder if that will blow up before the cooking time is done?"
or
2) Turn off the microwave?
If you answer 1, you may be scraping rice off the walls of your microwave. Hypothetically.
Still a Badass After All These Years
I sent Mom 90.7 a 1000 piece puzzle a few months ago.
Mom is an active puzzler, and she's got a hard-earned reputation for handling degrees of difficulty that would make the rest of us weep.
I saw this puzzle advertised on Slickdeals at a great price, and just sent it along. I had no idea that it was fiendish.
She persevered--as she does--and when it was done, she like it so much that she framed it and hung it on the wall.
That's the kind of thing you do when you're ninety and still a badass.
One More Thought on Star Citizen
There was something tickling me about the Star Citizen post, something that I couldn't quite express, but I think I figured it out.
There's a very logical reason (in a bad way) that all these crazy features like modeling bartender behavior and pilot urine trajectory based on urinal height (okay, that's not in yet, but just wait) keep getting added.
Here's why: it's impossible to justify an infinite amount of money unless you promise to do an infinite number of things.
So it's not a distraction that these bizarre, useless features keep getting added. It's an essential part of their fund-raising strategy. I think you could even argue that it's actually the core of their strategy.
This is an approach used by populist/authoritarian politicians as well. I can do everything, and only I can do it, so your support for me must be absolute.
I'm sure there are studies out there that establish what kind of person is receptive to this approach. I can say that I'm not one of them. As soon as someone starts promises infinity, I start laughing.
Friday Links!
I think we can all use something cheery, so let's start here (his reaction at the end is so funny): Little Man Scores! I can't remember if I linked to this before, but it's so soothing that I don't care: Enjoy Malinda serenading her chihuahua with a Beatles song. One more (I'm leaning into the happy/soothing right now): Boys just being dudes.
From C. Lee, and this is terrifying: ‘Like I was being eaten’: When police dogs bite, no one is accountable. This is both interesting and overdue: The U.S. Military Is Finally Fielding Body Armor Designed for Women. A provocative what-if: The Army's Mind-Bending 1,000-Mile Cannon Is Coming. Could It Bring Back Battleships? Hey, now, no bad talk about our better half: Not a Fan of Hawaiian Pizza, Processed Cheese, and California Rolls? Blame Canada. Unsurprising: Researchers gave thousands of dollars to homeless people. The results defied stereotypes.
From Eric Higgins-Freese, and this is a good read: How does Google’s monopoly hurt you? Try these searches.
From Wally, and damn, this is amazing: A Surreal New Bookstore Has Just Opened in China. There's some terrific stuff in here: Why first edition books can attract obsessive collectors and sell for eye-watering sums. This is big news: The first room-temperature superconductor has finally been found.
This is the most 2020 post ever
It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown won't air on CBS this year because Apple bought the rights.
I mean, you can watch it for free on Halloween. You just have to download the Apple TV+ app, create an iTunes account (adding a credit card), log into Apple TV+ with your iTunes account, and you're good to go.
Simple, man. Stop complaining.
The Daily WUTP Update
One.
I've figured it out
I've been wondering why Payday candy bars (which I still eat, on occasion) are only available in "King" size at the grocery story.
Then it came to me.
The only people who eat Paydays are so old that the company is worried we're struggling to keep on weight.
Archibald Wincemember Shares Some Pictures
First off, one more nice scene of fall:
Technically, I guess that's more of a nice tree of fall, but what a tree.
I saw this during a walk. You'll want to double-click on the picture for a full-sized version, but this person created a version of Candyland in her yard that kids can come in and interact with. This is such a big-hearted and generous thing to do, because 2020 sucks for kids, too.
Also, years ago, and I don't even know how many of you remember this, but I played Candyland with Eli 3.5 dozens of times and managed to lose every single time, which became our thing for a while. I would have terrible luck (which takes more work than it sounds) and we both thought it was hilarious. All I have to do is say "Candyland" now and he'll still burst out laughing.
A Useful Metric
For tracking the progress of a bladder infection, I'm fond of the WATP (Waking Up To Pee) metric.
I've gone down from a high of six to three last night, so I feel like I'm heading in the right direction.
How many times do I get up to pee during a regular night? I cannot release that information due to HIPAA privacy rules.
Also, thanks for Scott referring to me in an email as "Archibald Wincemember." This is entirely accurate.
A Paragon of Rational Thinking
From a friend: "I just saw a guy wearing a face mask while riding a motorcycle without a helmet."
I Believe This Description Is Accurate
A bladder infection feels like every angry person you ever met shouting inside your penis at the same time.
In other news, I have a bladder infection.
Men only get them rarely, but I won the lottery. Yay.
When I went to the doctor, she said that bladder infections are even more painful for men because we have a much longer urethra.
Again, yay.
Oh, and the heat went out three days ago and isn't fixed yet.
I've been sitting at a table, cold and ill, writing. I feel like I'm a character in a poorly written Dickens novel.
I Feel Like Someone Should Have Noticed This
This is the logo on the hats of the Atlanta Falcons coaches:
Let's have a closer look:
Man, that reminds me of something. Hold on, let me think.
Wait, this is it:
Burrito, anyone?
Oops
Eli's graduating at twenty-one, not twenty. That was a Freudian money slip, I think.
It's Funny How Things Work Out
Ironically, if Eli 19.2 was still playing hockey, I'd be feeling sick.
Heartsick.
If he was still playing junior hockey (a strong possibility, because very few players play D1 before they're twenty), he'd be facing the likelihood of his entire season being cancelled. I can't imagine how much that would hurt, especially after delaying college so that he would be more likely to play in D1.
If he was in college, he'd be hearing today that the NCAA granted an extra year of eligibility for all winter sport athletes.
With only three goalies a team, an extra year of eligibility disproportionately impacts the goalie position.
There would be some incredibly difficult situations to make, probably with very incomplete information.
When he quit hockey, it was painful. If he hadn't quit, though, he'd most likely have nothing right now.
Instead, he's on track to graduate at twenty-one with a double major of Public Policy and Spanish and a minor in writing. He's also assisting in the research and drafting of important legislation during his legislative internship.
He's still in monster physical condition thanks to rock climbing, and he's a three-handicap golfer after only playing for two years. So he still gets to compete, but his future doesn't depend on it. It's hard for your future to be so dependent on such a small number of coaches in a byzantine system. It wears you down.
Even in a pandemic, somehow everything has worked in his favor.
It's funny, but things working out for him makes it easier when things don't work out for me. His happiness creates a kind of natural buoyancy that lifts me up, too.
Free Money
It's always awkward for me when I ask you guys to purchase something I've created.
In this case, The Man You Trust, when it's done.
However, there is an Amazon deal for Prime members until the end of the day, and it gives you $10. The book will cost less than that.
Okay, that doesn't feel awkward now.
Here's the deal. If you're a Prime member, just go buy a $40 gift card. When you fill in your information, you should see a message below that says "You are eligible for a $10 Amazon credit that will be applied to your next purchase" or something like that.
Send the gift card to your email address and apply it to your account. Within 24 hours, you'll get another email saying the $10 credit is also being applied to your account.
If you buy anything from Amazon, it's free money.
You can only do this once, sadly, or it would have been one of the most outrageous deals of all time. Still, though, ten dollars American (as I used to call it with Eli 7.0) is a pretty sweet deal.
The Wayback Machine
Chris Roberts posted this in an open letter recently:
We chose to build a game of Star Citizen’s complexity and ambition, not because it is easy, but because it is hard. We are building a game that I, and I dare say all of you, have dreamed about since we first started playing games, a game that I never imagined could be possible due to the economics and technical challenges.
Yes, Roberts is remixing signature JFK phrases now.
It gets worse:
If you haven’t yet, take the time to watch today’s newly released “One Community” Video, which conveys the powerful connections and friendships forming in the SC Community every day. It is these connections that bind us all together, not just as gamers, but as people.
Get that, people? We're people!
Then a bunch of gibberish about futuristic systems which is basically five hundred buzzwords glued together with Band-aids.
Then this:
Star Citizen and Squadron 42 are games without compromise, with ambitions without parallel...I know everyone would like a definitive date on when Squadron 42 will be done but the best answer I can give you is that it will be done when it is done, and that will not be this year.
Those two statements are separated by a bit of text, but I put them together to show how it is highly likely that "without compromise" is closed related to having to say "it will be done when it's done." Without constraints, there is no completion. Of anything.
I think Roberts has done something that is usually promised only by dictators, which is everything. For many people, it's somehow easier to believe the Big Lie than the small one. And the narrative he's spun around the development of this game is so incredibly outrageous that it makes it easier to believe him.
Or not.
Just for fun, here are a few quotes from an interview he did with Games Industry. In 2012.
Here's the open:
Chris Roberts' Star Citizen game has raised over $8.6 million so far, and fans continue to jump in even though the game is more than a year away.
That did not age well.
Let's hear directly from Chris:
The engine is primed, and in the next couple of months we're going to start sharing more gameplay videos. The way I'm thinking of doing it is the game's two years out, but we're planning to release parts of the ultimate game early.
Hmm.
Roberts believes this process will result in a better game on a shorter time frame. "The typical way, even on an MMO, was 'OK, we're going to work on this MMO for four years, now we're going to do a closed beta' and you've got all these systems that come online and all these problems that start to sprout up. It's almost overwhelming," Roberts said. "When you have shorter development times it focuses you.
Hmm.
Unlike with a publisher, you can't pull the wool over their eyes because it's the real people who are going to be playing it. If you're a publisher you can visit me and I can show you the milestone, but you have no idea if behind the scenes I've got it jury-rigged or whatever. Whereas with the real community, there's no way.
Sir! I'd like to speak with you!
Development will continue until the money runs out. If the money is still there, this could go on for another five years. Or ten.
Or forever.
Let me remix Chris Roberts for an accurate conclusion: Our fundraising is without compromise, with ambitions without parallel.
Pandemic: The Golden Age of Sports Television
I admit, I didn't like it at first.
Sports with no crowds seemed empty. Soulless.
I kept watching, though, and after a while, a funny thing happened: I didn't miss the fans. At all.
There's something about packing large numbers of people in close proximity that turns too many of the into aggro assholes. If they can't come to the stadium? Problem solved.
No racist idiots heckling players. No one yelling catchphrases when golfers tee off. No fights in the stands.
Best of all, no multiple crowd shots between plays. All action, no distraction.
The NBA playoffs are probably going down as my favorite in history. The basketball normally slows way down in the playoffs, but it didn't this year. Every round was fast and exciting, with fantastic story lines.
Game Five on Friday night was one of the greatest NBA games I've ever seen, and I've been watching games for over fifty years (ouch).
Those little digital walls for remote fans that the NBA uses? That's great. That's close enough for me. Fans can contribute to the game that way, but they can't disrupt it.
This Sunday:
French Open Finals
Women's PGA Championship
NBA Finals
MLB Playoffs
NFL regular season
Honestly, it's been pretty great. It's the one thing I'll miss when the pandemic is over.
Friday Links!
Crows are astonishing, really: Brainiacs, not birdbrains: Crows possess higher intelligence long thought a primarily human attribute.
These are magnificent: Drone Photo Awards 2020.
This is an important video if you want to be more aware of why the current state of policing in the U.S. is so messed up (it's always been messed up): The Origins of Policing in America.
This is so incredibly adorable: Baby loves a nice head massage!
Don't blink: Falcon takes out duck at 340km/h.
From Wally, and the thought process is particularly interesting: The Stakes Are High — Scotch Bottle Puzzle Solved.
From Guy Byars, and it's terrifying: Simulation of a Nuclear Blast in a Major City.
This is both amazing and somewhat dystopian: Augmented reality goggles for military working dogs could let handlers give them commands remotely.
From David Gloier, and this could be incredible: The wreck of the WWII steamship Karlsruhe may hold lost Russian treasure.
Eric Higgins-Freese, and it could be very useful if it works for you: Combat Fatigue With the Army's 'Aggressive Napping' Strategy.
Closing out with the customary bundle of fantastic links from C. Lee, First, a cautionary tale about ignoring radicalism: The Joke's On Us. An origin story: Ski, party seed a pandemic: the travel rules that let COVID-19 take flight. This is fantastic: Jet suit trial for Great North Air Ambulance paramedics. This is fascinating, although it comes with a healthy amount of speculation (says the self-control guy): How self-control can actually unleash your dark side. These are quite beautiful: Yukino Ohmura Uses Stationery Store Stickers to Create Dazzling Nightscapes.
Pictures!
Fall in Michigan continues to be beautiful, and what I find particularly interesting is that it varies so much by street. This is in the middle of the day, but the overhang of the trees is blocking out the sun.
The beauty helps you get ready for the hellish winter to come.
I passed this house and felt like what they put in their windows deserved to be memorialized. Perhaps there is a higher logic at work.
Being a kid can be tough, and I bet this last name didn't make it any easier:
Also, I have no picture, but there is a man names "Snacks Harrison" playing defensive tackle in the NFL, which I find entirely delightful.
An Update
Back when I thought I was a writer, I wrote what I thought were three books.
They were not.
They were book-length manuscripts that I edited a few times and said, "Hey! I wrote a book!"
That is not being a writer.
One of the most difficult things about writing The Man You Trust is that I had to accept that I wasn't a writer. I was a hobbyist.
If I wanted to be an actual writer, I had to start over.
Which I did, and it's been hard.
Here's an example, which is very common at this point. Here's an example of an edited page:
Not so bad for a second draft. Except that's an eighth draft. Trust me, you don't want to see the seventh.
Here's the ninth draft:
Here's the stack of pages (only the heavily edited ones, not ones with minor changes) over the course of all drafts:
It's 5 1/2" high now. Probably in the range of a thousand pages. The book is two hundred pages long.
I've been keeping this stack because I sensed it was going to be important at some point to not just think about what I was doing, but what I had done. It reminds me of the time when I wasn't actually writing and how much distance I've put between myself and that moment.
I get up every morning and put in my time. I don't expect it to be good time, or inspired. It's work.
Occasionally, though, there are periods where everything makes sense and passages come together and everything flows like water. The last week has been like that.
This is going to be wrapped up by the end of the year.
George
George was just a tiny little guy when he came home with us:
George loved all of us, but I think Eli was always his favorite.
And now, a puzzling change to left-justified pictures, because Blogger formatting is a strange, bull-headed wonder that cannot always be deciphered.
George lived in uneasy détente with his sister Gracie, although they did have some nice moments:
One of George's hobbies was eating flowers, which we carefully selected for safety. I enjoyed looking at the same flowers that George enjoyed eating.
Another popular hobby was the bed game:
When no strangers were around, George was a Zen master of relaxation:
Enjoying the senior seat.
The porch was a favorite morning hangout.
Surprisingly, George was a big fan of snow, even though he had never seen it until later in life. He even played in the yard a few times in deep snow (with appropriate security measures taken to protect an unsuspecting populace). This is on the porch in winter.
I took this picture during George's last few days, with the swollen side of his face turned away.
George was a fine fellow and a beloved pet. We will always miss him.
A Note
George's eulogy didn't capture all of his warmth.
I broke down in the vet's office in a way that I didn't even think was possible for me. It was the difference between being sad and grieving, and even now, thinking about him touches a raw place in me that is very, very painful.
I've struggled for weeks to write the eulogy, because I couldn't write more than a few sentences without getting upset. I didn't want to wait any longer, though, so I resolved to do the best I could and say goodbye. It doesn't really do him justice, though.
I'll have some pictures tomorrow.
George
George came into our home when Eli 4.0 picked him out from a local shelter, and he stayed with us for over fifteen years.
He was an unlikely combination of Edwardian gentlemen and axe murderer.
This is a Camera Obscura lyric:
When you're lucid you're the sweetest thing
This is the single best sentence to describe George ever written. If you weren't on his pre-approved security list (which included only his family and children), then you were not welcome, and he would show you that with extreme prejudice. For much of his life, he would attack an adult stranger on sight, leading to a system of security gates that rivaled the Panama Canal.
At the same time, he also loved every child he ever met unconditionally.
Most of all, though, he loved us.
George was a cat of steady habits, and those habits were such a calming influence on all of us. When Eli woke up in the morning, he immediately went downstairs to greet him. In the afternoon, he slept on the senior seat (a cat perch with steps) in the sun. In the evening, he would come upstairs and we would shout "George!" as if he had been away forever.
Later in life, George came to prefer petting on the bed in the evening. If you caught his eye in the living room, he would turn like a horse and bustle down the hallway toward the bedroom, hoping to be followed. If you did, he would reward you with much affection and a thunderous purr.
Above all, if you were one of his people, George was a perfect gentlemen.
If you hadn't fed him on time, he would walk up and politely bump into you. No explanation was necessary. He would then leave, and after an appropriate length of time, he would return if you hadn't taken care of your responsibilities. There was never any unseemly crying, because George didn't do that.
George had a specific list of things he loved:
Crinkly paper
Licking the bathrub
Being petted in the back bedroom
Sitting on trays
Sitting on the back porch
Sleeping on the senior seat
Rolling on his back when he was relaxed
Sitting beside you while you watched tv
George bustled. He didn't run, particularly as he got older, but he had this bustle that he employed when he felt urgent that was absolutely endearing. He looked like an old man speeding up to catch a bus.
A few years back, he developed severe skin allergies, and he scratched at himself so much that large patches of his fur disappeared. We tried multiple prescribed medications, but nothing worked, and his quality of life was so low. After consulting with the vet, we decided to put him on steroids, even though there were long term complications of doing that for an extended period of time, particularly with the other medical issues he'd developed. But it was the only thing left to try.
It worked out better than we ever could have hoped. George stopped scratching, his fur grew back over a period of months, and he began his golden era as an amiable pensioner with no cares. He became even more affectionate, which was wonderful, and he seemed entirely content.
It was all lovely. And it stayed that way until he developed the lump on his face that started to cause him pain. Even then, he was steady. He was still gentle and sweet.
I miss him all the time now. There are so many moments that were always George moments, and those moments still happen, only he isn't there. Even now I wish I could have one more lazy day with him, neither of us in a hurry, just enjoying each other's company.
An Incredibly Rare Friday Post
So, the President has COVID-19.
The man who ignored every single health advisory and recommendation about how to lower your chances of catching the disease has now caught the disease. Allegedly.
I know that absentee voting has already begun, so let me just say this, and it's going to be the last political post I make before the election. Even if you subtracted one of the worst Presidents in history from the equation, there is still no Republican who deserves your vote. Not one.
The Republicans, in a democracy, have a core electoral strategy of making it more difficult for people to vote.
Just think about that for a minute.
It's not just at the national level. At the state level, where Republicans are in charge, it's happening all over (particularly in Texas). Their strategy for retaining power in a democracy is to subvert that democracy.
They have to be stopped. So please think about that when you vote. Thank you.
You Can Really Screw Up A Post By Leaving Out One Word
In this case, the word "no" out of the "An Attempt To Soothe" pay, which has now been corrected.
Friday Links!
An election we can all get behind: Fat Bear Week is the matchup 2020 needs. This is incredibly promising: Chitin could be used to build tools and habitats on Mars, study finds.
This is a stunning article from Brian Witte: Oklo’s Natural Nuclear Reactors.
From Scott Martin, and it's a fascinating read: Kiran Shah: The hero with a thousand faces.
From David Gloier, and it's mind-melting: A Student Just Proved Paradox-Free Time Travel Is Possible.
From Scott Gould, and the videos are hilarious: How comedian Michael Spicer hangs politicians out to dry.
From Wally, and somehow I'm not surprised: When coffee makers are demanding a ransom, you know IoT is screwed. This is stunning: NIKKEN SEKKEI completes timber gymnastics center for tokyo olympic games. These are remarkable: Amazing But True Aviation Stories.
From Chris Pencis, and it's totally arresting: Celui qui tombe (He who falls), Yoann Bourgeois’ turntable acrobatics.
Excellent links from C. Lee. First, a positive contribution in a negative time: How a small Nagoya firm made a big impact in coronavirus fight. I won't purchase a rain jacket without it: Robert Gore, Who Kept Us Dry and Cool in the Rain with His Gore-Tex Invention, Has Died. Incredibly typical: Pentagon Got $1 Billion to Fight Coronavirus, Bought Drones, Jet Parts, and Body Armor Instead: Report. This is absolutely amazing: 1,000-Year-Old Precursor to Stainless Steel Found in Iran, Surprising Archaeologists. A fascinating essay/book review on Stan Lee: Marvelous Belief. These are incredible: Kirie Artist Carves Playful Narratives Into Tree Leaves. I've never heard of these before: How Reykjavik's Sheet-Metal Homes Beat the Icelandic Winter. We should all be frightened by this: The Flashing Warning of QAnon.
An Attempt To Soothe
I walked here on Thursday. There were no Presidents refusing to denounce white nationalism, which was quite a relief:
And now a mystery in two parts. Part one:
What have we here? An interesting use of color, but the image seems strangely unfinished. The artist has even left their tools of the trade on the sidewalk. Who does that?
Part two:
And then the murders began.
The Castella Pancake, Which Totally Doesn't Sound Like A Sexual Position At All
Castella Pancake Recipes: Japanese fluffy skillet souffle pancake.
In a week where we are probably all feeling stressed, this is quite possibly the most soothing cooking video I have ever seen, and these pancakes look next next next level.
